So come vibe with us
Welcome to the Funk Bible
The new testament

People get ready, nouveau dance here
All the girls and all the boys, 
Get close, have no fear, (have no fear)
We're gonna do le grind y'all
Got U where I want U
And girl it's going 2 feel so good, (feel so good)
Up and down, up and down, on the beat y'all
Like a pony would, pony would

Le Grind
All the boys, grab a girl, get down on the floor
This funky beat's gonna show u,
Gonna show u what your hips r made 4
Nouveau grind, come on (people)
People it's much 2 late,
It's much 2 late 2 be shy
London, what does Big Ben say?
(time 2 do the grind) 
no hear U say (time 2 do the grind)

Le Grind
Baby, I gotcha where I wantcha, 
Now I gotcha where I wantcha, wantcha
Ce soir, [la chantez], all night long (all night long) 
Ce soir, [la chantez], all night long (all night long) 
{{ French: "Tonight, sing it" }}
Hey pretty mama, with the long hair
Is that your boyfriend?
Ha, I don't care
Cuz' I can do, said I can do
tricks he can never do
When I get naked, we'll see the real u
Am I getting thru? (grind) 
I gotcha where I wantcha (baby) 
baby, baby
piano man, put it where it feel good

Grind, grind, grind, grind
Le Grind, grind, Le Grind, grind

This party, this party is gonna last all night
When I give the cue scream, alright?
Party (party)
Party (party)
u say it, party (party)
Clap your hands double time

All the boys say "Yeah Yeah" (Yeah Yeah)
All the girls say "Oh Yeah" (Oh Yeah)
Now all u others say "Hell Yeah" (Hell Yeah)
Too sexy, Grind, Grind
(not yet Bonnie)

Grind, grind, grind, le grind
grind, grind, le grind, oh ya

People, get ready, nouveau dance here
Girls and boys, get close, have no fear
(Grind) Doin' the grind, doin' the grind, in here
(Put it where it feels good)

Hey yeah

I do believe that we've... truly touched on something... nouveau

(La la la la la la) 
(La la la la la la) 
Ooowww, c'mon, am I in the right place? (La la la la la la la)
(don't move) (La la la la la la)
Ooh, R u sure baby? R u sure (La la la la la la) 
I'm in the right place? (La la la la la la la) 
(Don't move, don't move)

(grind, grind) 
c'mon (grind, grind, grind, grind, grind, grind)
Girl put it where it feel good
(grind, grind, grind) 
not there, not there (grind, grind, grind, grind)
Put it where it feels good (grind, grind, grind, grind)
Slow down (grind)

Slammin'

Le Grind

Up and down, up and down, feels so good
Up and down, up and down, like a pony would
Up and down, up and down, feels so good
Up and down, up and down,
Like a pony would (Like a pony would) 
Like a pony would (Like a pony would)
Like a pony would

Le Grind

Uh, slammin'

Grind, grind (serve it up, Frankie)

Slammin'

Put it where it feel good 

Grind

People (get ready, people, noveau dance here)
(People, get ready, doin' the grind) 
(up in here, up in here)
People, get ready (grind, grind) 
((Frankie, how do u know...))
Le Grind, grind

Grind

(Cindy C, play with me)
(I will pay the usual fee)
Aahhh Cindy C, (What's it gonna be?) 
will u play with me? (What's it gonna be?)
(Cindy C, play with me)
(I will pay with usual fee)
Aahhh Cindy C, (What's it gonna be?) 
I'll pay the fee (Cindy C)

Super-fine heifer (super fine)
I saw u in the Vogue
I knew you would be trouble, (trouble, trouble)
but why go (go,go) 
I'll give you 7 sips of
Elderberry wine (1,2,3,4,5,6,7)
Maybe we'll unlock the
Secrets of your mind

(Cindy C, play with me)
(I will pay the usual fee)
Aahhh Cindy C, (What's it gonna be?) 
will u play with me? (What's it gonna be?)
(Cindy C, play with me)
(I will pay with usual fee)
Aahhh Cindy C, (What's it gonna be?) 
I'll pay the fee (Cindy C)

The passion's in the mix. (Serve it up, Sheila)
Drink it quick - Cindy, shit
Where'd u get that beauty mark?
Maybe u and I should be undressing

Don't all girls look the same? They don't?
Oh, what a shame.
Cindy, Cindy. I'll pay the usual fee
What's the matter, don't u like me?

([help me] tell me what it's all about)

I'm talking about a long [crucial wait](Cindy C Listen
Girl, if I have 2 beg (She's so tired)
I'm gonna see u in (Look at me)
your birthday suit tonight (She doesn't look as good as I do)
I'm sure you're quite intelligent (U think she does, but think again. See?)
A whiz at math and all that shit (how 'bout that?)
But I'm, I'm a tad more interested (Ah ha ha look it,)
(She can't even walk in those shoes) 
(I can walk better than that)
in flyin' your kite tonight (She can't even dance)
Cindy, is that alright? (I would give somethin' to know)
(how she ever sees anyone)
(Cindy C)
Oohhh Cindy C, will u play with me?
I'll pay the usual fee

Two organ solos 2 go...

(Oh Cindy C, Oh Cindy C, Oh Cindy C, Oh Cindy C)
(Oh Cindy C, Oh Cindy C, Yeah, Oh Cindy C, Oohhh Cindy C)
(Oh Cindy C, Oohhh, Oohhh, Oh Cindy C)
(Oh Cindy C, Will u play with me?)
(Oh Cindy C, I will pay the fee)
(Ah Cindy C, Will u play with me?)
(Ah Cindy C, I will pay the fee)

Help me (aaww shit)

Excuse my savoir faire, 
But, baby I'm dying 2 take u everywhere (Oh yeah?)
I wanna show u 2 my friends
Because baby, you're the living end (Tell me now)
Let me have a debt worth winning, 
I can feel your ice is thinning
Like a frozen pond in spring 
Your furry melting thing awaits me
Your furry melting thing awaits me, (Oh Cindy C)
and my six-string (Will u play with me?)

(Cindy, where r u?)
C'mon Cindy (Oh my God)
C'mon Cindy (Wait)
Don't u want 2 play with me? (Ah, yes, no, wait)
Don't u want 2 play with me? (Yes)
What's the matter with me, Cindy? (Nothing) 

[shockadelica]

Oh Cindy C, won't u play with me?

Music is the key 2 set yourself free
From depression, drugs and increasing poverty
The key is 2 the lock, the lock is on the door
The door has a knob that u've never turned before
The jack, use the jack, it opens up the lock
Cuz there's the key 2 unlock the body
Place it like that 2 open up the door
The door 2 the house full of people galore
The beat won't stop 'til the JM jocks
And he jacks the box 'til the party rocks
The clock tick-tocks and the place gets hot
And believe it or not, all the troubles u forgot
It's just that easy if u want it 2 be
For all the fellas, and the young ladies
So ease your mind and set yourself free
2 the mystifying music that we call Cindy C

Oh Cindy C, won't u play with me? 
Oh Cindy C

Uh, Dead on it

Shall we go back? (Yeah!) 
Let's go

Negros from Brooklyn play the bass pretty good
But the ones from Minneapolis play it like it oughta should
A magnum fro is better when u got a poof on it
And the 2 and fro is funky when the grease is dead on it

(Funky dead on it)
uh, dead (on it) on it

Shall we go back? Let's go

They dead on it, wow

See the rapper's problem usually stem from being tone deaf
Pack the house then try 2 sing, 
there won't be no one left (ha ha) (on it)
Parking lot's on fire, brothers peelin' out of the town
They say in disgust, they singin' their guts
Rappin' done let us down (down down) 
u got 2 be dead... on it

Dead on it

(dead)

All the sisters like it when u lick 'em on the knees
Don't believe me? (no) 
Try it once then stop, they'll be begging
Please, please, please (please, please, please)
Shoo be doo wa, dead on it
What does that have 2 do with the funk?
Nothing, but who's paying the bills?
If u don't wanna lick my knees, I'm sho' your mama will

Uh, cuz we, cuz we, cuz we dead on it

De, de- de- de- de- de- de, dead on it, on it 

La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la, la

My bed's a coffin, Dracula ain't got shit on me
My nickname's Hell's-a-Poppin', I'm badder than the Wicked Witch
I got a gold tooth, costs more than your house
I got a diamond ring on four fingers, each one the size of a mouse

They dead, they dead on it, on it

La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la, la

La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la, la

Wait now, hang up, dial tone on the 3
U know, U know, I'm busy, 2 scizzy
Can't nobody fuck with me

Cuz I'm dead (on it, on it, on it)
on it

Shoo be doo wa wa, dead on it

Dead on it, on it, on it

Dang, dang, dang, dang, (dead on it) shoo be dang, dang, dang, dead on it
Dead, dead on it

When 2 R in love
They whisper secrets
Only they 2 can hear
When 2 R in love

When 2 R in love (love)
Their stomachs will pound
Every time the other comes near
When 2 R in love

When 2 R in love
Falling leaves will appear 2 them
Like slow motion rain (slow motion, slow motion)

When 2 R in love
The speed of their hips
Can be faster than a runaway train

drop, drop, drop, drop, water, water, water

Come bathe with me
Let's drown each other in each others emotions
Bathe with me
Let's cover each other with perfume and lotion
Bathe with me
Let me touch your body 'til your river's an ocean
Bathe with me
Let's kiss with one synonymous notion
That nothing's forbidden and nothing's taboo
When the 2 R in love
l.o.v.e. - l.o.v. - can U hear me?

When 2 R in love
Their bodies shiver at the mere contemplation
Of penetration (let alone the act)
Let alone the actual act

When 2 R in love
The thought of his tongue in the V of her love 
In his mind, this thought it leads the pack

Come bathe with me
Let's drown each other in each others emotions
Bathe with me
Let's cover each other with perfume and lotion
Bathe with me
Let me touch your body 'til your river's an ocean
Bathe with me
Let's kiss with one synonymous notion
That nothing's forbidden and nothing's taboo
When the 2 R in love
(Love) in love - can U hear me?

(hold me)
(yeah)
(just like that)
(don't move)

New coat, huh?
That's nice
Did u buy it?
Yeah, right
U seeing that rich motherfucker again
U know who I'm talking about
That slicked back paddy with all the gold in his mouth
Don't try to play me 4 yesterday's fool
Cuz I'll slap your ass into the middle of next week
I'm sorry baby, that's the rules

I pay the rent in this raggedy motherfucker
And all u do is suck up food and heat
Say what? Oh yeah?
4 someone who can't stand them T.V. dinners
U sure eat enought of them motherfuckers
Who bought u that diamond ring?
Yeah, right.
Since when did u have a job?
U seeing that rich motherfucker again
What's his name? Bob?
Bob, ain't that a bitch?
What's he do for a living?
Manage rock stars?
Who?
Prince?
Ain't that a bitch?
That skinny motherfucker with the high voice?
Please, who do I look like baby?
Yesterday's fool?
Don't u know I will kill u now?
U're fuckin' right.
I gotta gun
U think I don't?
Then what's this?
Oh, u quiet now
uh uh!
Little? Yeah, right. It might be little but it's loud

Yeah, right.
Uh uh!

Now put that suitcase down
And go in there 
And put on that wig I bought U
No, No
No, No
The reddish-brown one
Bob, ain't that a bitch?
Oh
Gotcha 
Got ya

Hey Bob, if u're out there, let me see u dance
U said u was funky
C'mon, c'mon

Ain't that a bitch?
Bob

(Come out with your hands up)
I'll kick your ass (This is your last warning)
Think I won't? (Oh no! The nigger's got a laser)
(Let's get the hell out of here)

Is Mr. George home?
Hello, Mr. George? {Note: The high pitched voice}
This is your conscience, motherfucker {that responds to his call, when}
Why don't u leave motherfuckers alone? {slowed down to about 2 rpm,says}
What's wrong with u? {"Operator, what city please?"}
Well, why can't we just dance?
Why can't we just dance?
No, fuck that, fuck that
I don't talk about u, I don't talk about u
Wit' yo' little almond-shaped head ass
Who the fuck do u think this is?
I'll kick your ass... twice

Bob, if u're out there
Let me see u dance
U said u were funky, c'mon

B-O-B, spell the shit backwards, what'd it say
Same motherfuckin' shit

Turn it out 

Bob, ain't that a bitch?

If your body needs water
Keep on dancing cuz u oughta
Keep the blood flowing down 2 your feet
Brother Lois should be around in a minute
With a bucket filled with squirreled meat

The blood is real good if u drink it real fast
But the aftertaste just lasts and lasts
If u kiss somebody, u wanna party all night
All right!

Superfunkycalifragisexy
Superfunkycalifragisexy

If u do 2 much, your skin will be sensitive 2 touch
The first person that touches u, u want 2 fuck
U take them 2 your crib and u tie them 2 a chair
Then u make funny faces til they get really scared
Then u turn on the neon, then u play with yourself
Til u turn them on

Superfunkycalifragisexy
Superfunkycalifragisexy

This beat is on time, refined and designed
2 make u do the do

Superfunkycalifragisexy

This chair goes round and round, I feel like a clown
Cuz I'm stripped down, It's all fun and games
Til the very next day, til, damn, u don't remember my name
Maybe I'll see u next Thursday night, maybe I won't
But that's alright, cuz in my possession, there's a signed confession
that says, I was the best u ever had

2 bad

This beat is on time, refined design
2 make u do the do

Superfunkycalifragisexy (woah yeah)
Superfunkycalifragisexy (woah yeah)

Baby...

Keep the blood flowin' down 2 your feet
Brother Lois will be round in a minute

Superfunkycalifragisexy

Superfunkycalifragisexy

This beat is on time, refined and designed
2 make u do the do

Superfunkycalifragisexy

In seven measures, I want somebody 2 scream

Superfunkycalifragisexy

If your body needs water, keep dancing cuz u oughta
Keep the blood flowin' down 2 your feet
Brother Lois will be around in a minute
With a bucket filled with squirreled meat

If u can't beat 'em, (if u can't beat 'em)
Join 'em (join 'em)

Slammin'

This beat is on time, all of the time
So refined, specially designed
2 make u do the do (2 make u do the do)
Super..

In seven measures I want somebody 2 ...

This is Girl, did u know
precisely what I let Robert
I intend 2
do, honey. cut my hair this
Lookit... morning?
oh, girl,
where'd u get
those shoes? He looked so bad!
These are I'm so tired.
fuck-me pumps. He's great!
Mmm-hmm, Who, Robert? Is this full enough?
I know that's
right, honey Frankie, I just Maurice, man go on up there
want an apology and say somethin'
Maurice, what or u can kiss [{backwards whisper}]
can I serve u? my supernatural ass Frankie, play
Squirrel Meat! something, bitch
Don't try it!

Cat, what's happenin' babe? Bitch, will u play something?
Get outta my face!
Honey, it's not that type of party [talk 2 me, talk 2 me]
Whatchoo mean? [...] answer to life
Honey, u see these pumps? Answer honey, [you ain't gonna quit]
I wanna, I wanna, I want u Bitch!
2 meet some friends of mine Who u callin' bitch? Ho bitch!
Who? Who u callin' "Ho bitch,"?
No no, you'll like them, Black ho bitch! (Why don't u play)
(somethin...shit)
they're... they're musicians...

2 Nigs United 4 West Compton!

Rock hard in a funky place

Here comes a lady so u cover up
She's a freaked out, 
Funky electric mama with double cups
Say u, u could cop if u wanted 2
Because something near your leg
Is haunting u, such a disgrace
U're rock hard in a funky place, ow!

Rock hard in a funky place

U was workin' on the line
U could drop on her
But u couldn't concentrate
When your dick saw her
Maybe if u cop a nut in the car (Maybe if u cop a nut in the car)
Maybe u could think
About playing guitar

(Rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock)
(Rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock) 
Oh yeah

Rock hard in a funky place

All you're looking 4 is love
Or a reason 2 believe there's a God above
Pretty soon you'll get enough
And head back 2 a life so tough
I just hate 2 see an erection go 2 waste
I'm just-a rock hard in a funky place

Rock hard in a funky place
Say it
Rock hard in a funky place
Rock hard in a funky place
Oohh U rock hard in a funky place
U rock hard in a funky place
Say it, y'all

(rock, rock) 
what? (rock, rock, rock, rock)
We gotta go, y'all
tune in next week (rock, rock)
Same time (rock, rock) 
same boogie (rock, rock, rock, rock, rock hard) 
oohhh yeah (rock, rock, rock, rock) 
we will rock, y'all (rock, rock)

But until then keep your finger on the trigger
That's the only way it'll get bigger

(What kind of fuck ending was that?)